The spirit within

I stumbled upon E.L's Huff Post piece about turning 25. I am reading a lot lately. Perhaps I thought it could keep my mind off things. I thought I am okay, until, I knew I wasn't. I am not.
How could I found that one piece of writing, that bloody honest-to-god memoir from some random writer/blogger/teacher!?
Of all the blogs, journals, articles, books (and whatnot) I have read or tried reading these past two weeks could not sum up to the words I have been longing to read, to feel, to hold on to, to wake myself up..
How can two souls, continents apart experience the same thing?
How can, how did she found that courage to write so honestly that it made me hate myself for not having that courage to be honest to myself for being not okay.
How did I found someone who felt the way I did, the way I do now.
How did I found someone who cried so little and so much inside as much as I did?
Was it the spirit within?
Was it the universe's way of guiding me by introducing me to a teacher?
I did not sleep the whole night and drove to work at 6. Thinking the whole night.
She wrote back to me. A total stranger who completely felt my pain, who was so willing to write to me again.
I cried reading her reply. I cried because I had to wake up.

when alternative is the mainstream today

I am alone because I have moved on. and it feels I am the only one. It was a part of my lifestyle once, but I grew past it. It feels awkward to look back at things I used to do or say, but that was the younger me. I can't actually blame myself for it. I have to let that go because I need to carry on my life in the next phase. I have wasted 3 years on it, so no more. I don't think I owe anyone any part of my life. If you want to be a part of my life, to be remembered, be in my real life because I do not have a virtual world.
That said, I am not weird. I am just living my life. and having principles and the courage to carry out my convictions.
So don't be a coward and stick to your principles.

Wait

I stood there looking back at how once a upon a time I used to be that person. and I realized I am still that person. That same old shadow. Time waits for no one. and No one would actually wait for you. That is the bitter part.

7 Things....

why I love celebrating new year's day

1

Bank holiday! yet another super legit reason to be away from work!

TWO

Starting anew. What better reason to say.. it's the new year let's forget everything that happened last year!

3

new year. new resolutions? nevermind if you oughta break it heee

FOuR

Perfect time to get busy in the kitchen says my epicurean alter ego.

5ive

a year older. more freedom to do whatever I want!

Six
feels nice to say Happy New Year. even to a stranger.

7

new year tend to give me some kind of hope that the new year actually be better. no?



Anyways....

HAPPY 2014!