tell the truth and shame the devil

sometimes honesty aint the best policy in life, to a certain extent of course.

i am currently spreading a lie. and i am tired of it. i wonder how JangMiri(google Miss Ripley ;-]) could live in a tangled web of lies!
i understand the whole one-lie-that-leads-to-another situation because currently, i am living it! i know one day i will get hurt real bad.
eventhough originally that lie was meant for just one person. in the end, a whole bunch of people got involved. i am wrong. i know that. because this is my conscience speaking. however it had failed(miserably) to deter me from starting the lie.
you must be pretty curious about what lie i am talking about. it is the only lie that i am most concerned. err..
there is another one. i wouldn't call it a lie. it is more of a secret. *in the state of denial* teehee
anyhow, back to "that" lie. you'll be updated soon if "that" lie actually works. *fingerscrossed* though i know i don't deserve a lucky shot in this =(

Mr Emotions

Mr T _ T
I almost lost Lady this morning. I used to imagine how I’d react if one day Lady left us. This morning was a close call. The moment I saw my sister weeping, tears started rolling down my cheeks despite my effort to stay calm and regain my composure. All of the sudden I felt so numb.
Mr Anger
He made me so mad again today. It is so tiring to talk to him. or even listen to his goddamn boring lectures. I’m so glad I’d be working for another 2 weeks only.
Mr Happy
Happy to be able to bump into April at NKVE on the way back from work! but the truth is, I didn’t really bump into her. She actually gave me a chase from NKVE all the way back to Klang. Haha. Sorry Rouyan, I had a lot to take in today. I left my heart at home. I’ve got to hurry home to get it back. The truth is I wasn’t paying attention to anything since this morning. But I am glad I met you on my way home

i am still alive

updates

i hate working for people i know

i hate the stress

i hate the gossips

i've started the J/J project but i just couldn't find the right time to write a post about it

i haven't been sleeping well for the past 3 weeks

i've been very grumpy and emotional hence the frequent nervous- breakdown

i hate being bribed

i hate feeling unworthy

i hate uncertainties in my life

i hate being controlled by a dictator

i hate feeling this way

i hate feeling hopeless

i hate the fact i can't express myself the way i wanted to

because i was told i could only have one....

if you've been given a choice between your
career

or

family(life)

which would you choose?

me?
i would willingly give up my career because i am not willing to sacrifice my life and freedom for a paycheck. i may be silly(and naive) but i do not want to see myself becoming some one who sacrifices her whole life for a paycheck.
i was even told to get a boyfriend while i'm in university because i will not have a chance/time to date!(if i decided to work there)
how absurd is that?
and my boss? oh my, where/how should i start? sigh
i don't even wanna get there. i'll give you a word. intimidating. i guess this word is sufficient. no explanation required.
if you are eager to know further, ask me when i see you. LOL.
to be honest, i will definitely be successful if i choose career. but, i believe i could achieve much more than just a career.
i want both. a life/family and a career as well. yea, i am greedy. because i am human. judge if you can't help it.